Feed your FAITH and your fears will starve .

Friday, June 21, 2013

Happy Father's Day and More

Lately it seems as though life is speeding by at the speed of light.  Last week my baby turned 16!  What!?  Where did all those years go? She is growing up to be such an amazing young woman...I am continually in awe of her maturity and great attitude.  She definitely has A LOT of Trent in her.  Thank goodness!

Last week Megan and Zach attended a Pioneer Trek in Martins Cove in Wyoming.  The day they returned was Megan's birthday.  She had no idea but while she was gone I organized a party for her and her friends.  She was super excited and had a blast!

Many thanks to Greg and Erin for the outdoor movie!

Watching "Spirit"
We watched "Spirit of the Cimmarron", Megan's favorite movie from the time she was about 4 years old.  Megan loved it but I think some of the girls were not nearly as excited. We had to cut the movie short when it started raining lightly.
 We moved the party inside so Megan could blow out the candles on her trifle; she hates cake.
When Jonny saw all the girls giving her presents he decided she needed one from him too.  He ran into the den and put his own sunglasses in an envelope and covered it in stickers.  He brought it out to her and said, "Happy Birthday Megan. I want you to have my glasses.  I love you very much.  It makes my heart happy."  Oh my gosh!  Of course all the girls swooned over that one.

With all the love going around I thought I would share some too.  The next morning I took Jarom and Zach and went shooting with some friends.  I was impressed with their aim!  They both shot pretty well.  We exploded all sort of pop cans and potatoes.  It was so fun!  I have now added a 44 magnum to my list of wants. :)

I knew that Father's Day was going to be a tough one so I opted not to take the kids to church that day.  I decided to recreate the amazing day we had last year on Mother's Day.  Trent planned a whole day for me and it was wonderful...great memories.
Mother's Day 2012
We prepared the same meal that Trent made for us last year.  All the kids pitched in and helped get ready to go to Huntsville to the same park and the same picnic table.

Before we left for the park I gave everyone a brand new Husker shirt.  I figured that would be a gift that Trent would love to receive for Father's Day so I got one for all of us in his honor.
Of course we couldn't have Father's Day without Trent so we brought him along for a family photo.  I kinda like it! :)  We spent the afternoon playing on the playground and kicking around a soccer ball.  I also lined up the kids with mitts and hit balls to them.  When we got tired we laid down on our blanket and made paper cutouts of the Brigham City Temple.  After our "craft time" was over we told stories...some true and some made up.  On the way home we cranked up the 80's music and sang at the top of our lungs.  We laughed a lot and just enjoyed a leisurely day doing exactly what would have made Trent giddy.
I really thought I had conquered Father's Day.  It was such a huge success!  But of course I got the wind knocked out of me the next day.  I thought I was doing well enough to tackle some of the boxes of our belongings that were being stored in the basement.  The first thing I found was Trent's student ID card from UNL.  Shortly after that I found a letter I had written to him on Father's Day in 2009.  That was it.  I was done for.  I sat on the floor and sobbed and sobbed.  Megan and Mallory were both there in a second.  Megan gently stroked my hair and Mallory followed her lead.  A moment later Mallory slowly tucked herself into my lap and Megan knelt down and threw her arms around my shoulders and let me cry and cry and cry.  

It usually takes a while for me to recover from a breakdown like that.  The rest of my day was not fabulous. Megan tried hard to make it better for me though.  She knows that music heals me and she willingly sang as many songs as I played on the piano.  That helped a lot. The next day I had some residual grumpiness going on.  Mallory was pestering me for something and I said, "Just to warn you Mallory, I am super grumpy so you are probably not going to get what you want."  Right away Megan and Zach were chiming in trying to make me happy.  They were laughing and asking what was wrong and why I would waste my time being grumpy.  Finally Zach said, "I think this calls for some Happy Jacks!  Do a Happy Jack Mom, I am sure it will make you smile!"  He was right, it did make me smile.  As I left the house for my Relief Society meeting I heard Megan and Zach yelling, "I love you Mom! You are the best mom ever!"  

Today is the 10 month mark for us.  All in all we are doing well.  It seems like an eternity since I have seen Trent yet I am shocked over and over again when I realize he is not physically here with us.  You would think that part would have sunk in by now but it is still hard to believe.  I am so profoundly aware of all the blessings in my life.  I have the  most amazing husband and my children are blessed with the best Dad ever!  Trent has made such an impact on our lives and we miss him every day.  Happy Father's Day Trent...until we see you again...GO HUSKERS!


  1. Perfect Fathers day. He had to have been there in spirit. He wouldn't have let all that Huskers pride go unnoticed! I sent him an email. I think he probably did receive it. He knows all our hearts.

  2. Holly we're still thinking about you all the time! Sounds like you had an awesome Father's Day (it's the pits for us too :) and I am inspired at your ability to make important memories for your family. We love ya!

    Cousin Michelle

  3. Love this fathers day. Holly- you are amazing. You are truly surrounded by angels. Thank you for sharing with us- and Go Big Red.